With enough determination, any doll can be a sex doll made me glad I wasn't drinking coffee when I read it. I'll be chuckling over that for a while. Well done, sir!

Long time reader, first time commenter, just to thank Scott for the support for all us "Micheal"s.

Think of it as 'Micha-El', with El being Hebrew for God, and Micha meaning, um, whatever it does.

I hate Michael too, but it's because whenever someone hasn't properly learned my name, for some unfathomable reason that's always what they use instead. Matthew is a very common name, it's not hard, and the only thing is has in common with Michael is the first letter. So why, every single time?

Technically, it's the pronunciation of "Michael" that's wrong, not the spelling. Hebrew roots and all that.

Personally, I'm glad to see someone else recognizes tha M-i-c-h-a-e-l is terrible.

I know an individual who is right and (horribly) wrong an awful lot.

Like Rick, he appears unaware of the reactions he provokes, and wonders why people prefer not to spend time in his company. (He's actually not a bad guy, just - well, weird doesn't really describe him)

Hmm, My-Kull, Mike L, Mai-Kul, Mai-Tai.

I actually was drinking coffee when I read this, but I don't do spit takes.

I think I have much to teach the world too, but I'm keeping it to myself. None of it involves dolls, anyway.

Panel 4 FTW!

Agreed! Michael is just simply wrong! It should be Mycull.

Thanks to this comic, I will never again be able to look at a troll doll without shuddering.

F- U Scott!

My parents worked very hard at selecting a name for their son because they wanted their boy to be their unique and special snowflake. Then they went with the most common boy's name for the last 20 years. I'm specael, just like all the other Michaels out there.

Did Rick read the 5/23/12 Dilbert right before panel 4?

Michael = mem yud chaf alef lamed (Hebrew letters)
mem yud = mi = who?
chaf = cha = like (as in, comparable)
alef lamed = el = God
so Mi / cha / el = who is like God?
(The answer, by the way, is Ein cha-el, nobody is like God.)
None of which convincingly defends my middle name, which is actually a rhetorical question.

My mother wanted to name my brother "Michael", but also hates the spelling. She opted for spelling it "Mikel", which seemed like a good idea until every one of his school teachers, when they saw his name on the roll, pronounced it so that it rhymed with "pickle."

No proof of purchase needed for the bookplate?

Note from Scott: I suppose I could have you cut off the front cover and send it in. ... Nah, no proof of purchase needed. The honor system has worked pretty well for me so far, and what are you going to do, put my signature in other people's books?

"If you proclaim your beliefs publicly and consistently enough, you will eventually find like-minded people."
Sounds like the strategy of most politicians... or perhaps they actually believe that such proclamations will win converts. (Sadly, it seems to work a little too well.)

@ John Walters re: troll dolls... Oh, EEEEW!

I spell it Michael and I dont care. Yes, I know about the A and the E. As previously stated, I don't care.

'Michael' is the spelling on my birth certificate, bu I believe the spelling should actually be "S-T-O-R-M-A-G-E-D-D-O-N-D-A-R-K-L-O-R-D-O-F-A-L-L"

Does Scott mean in the last panel that rick is wrong as in incorect, or wrong as in depraved, desturbed or insane? It seems more likely to be the second meaning.

Somebody's using your idea:

http://i.imgur.com/3g808.jpg

*Michael* is spelled wrong??!! Well, you stated your obviously wrong belief and we honor you for it. Is this a great country or what?

Hey! I'm Michael. It's the name of the angel that leads God's angelic army.

Count me in, and add the spelling Micheal to it. It should be spelled Mycle, like 'cycle'.

And then there's Michaela....

Scott, I don't want to go there, but you've left me no choice...

Are Muppets dolls?

nonsensicles, I know what you mean.
My name is spelled phoneticly, so everybody can get it wrong.
I don't understand what's so hard to pronounce abour Deena, but I get called Dee-anna, Diana, Denna, Denine, Donna, Delia, and once, Kevin, but that turned out to be a typo.
I gave up and shortened it to Dee decades ago; people seem to be able to pronounce that.

What? No love for Panel 1? For the record, it was my favourite panel - I'd really like it as a T-Shirt.

I am part of "they"

I totally agree with panel 3. That's something which has bothered me for a long time. It's about time somebody said it.

John Walters: I was able to read the comic itself and come away unscathed. Now I have read your comment about troll dolls and I am ruined.

As for "Michael" -- Like the Matthew above, I am typically called "Mike" by people who can't be bothered to pay attention. But that's actually my brother's name, so it's doubly painful.

But I make up for it by pronouncing it either "MICH-ael" as in "Mitchell," the truly awful Joe Don Baker movie all MST3K fans will shudder to see mentioned, or "Mick-AEL" as in "McHale" of "McHale's Navy" fame. Either way, the name is diminished, and the goal is achieved.

Some years ago a young engineer in the next block had a leaving do at lunchtime. They bought him an inflatable sheep sex doll as a leaving present. As I departed work that evening I saw it had been left on a workbench, inflated, for all the world to see through the window. I mentioned this to the security guard on reception on my way out.

"Yes", said he. "Disgusting, isn't it?"
"Still, it was only a joke" I said. "They were all pretty drunk and it was just a laugh."
"But" said the security guard, "It has been used."

Two questions have bothered me ever since: How did he know? And why did he check?

Ordered Masking Tape Mummy through Amazon to put an order over $25. Now wishing I had bought a micro-hibachi instead (or is that "instaed"?) and gotten Scott's book through the site. Still, the other book I bought was a pre-order of Adam Carolla's Not Taco Bell Material. Scott gets credit for turning me onto that podcast (my first ever... sniff) back when it first started. Scott and Adam are peas in a pod - doing their own thing on the Internet and making us all laugh. Let's support them both. For anyone that is on the fence, the subscription is more than worth it, and remember that you can send a check if you don't like Paypal.

I believe Myq Kaplan would agree.

Mikle. If you wanna get really fancy? Mykle.

Want to chime in and agree that the subscription IS VERY WORTH IT! Actually it's worth more, but don't tell Scott.

I have a friend named "Michel". Not an improvement, as people read that and immediately think it is a girl's name. He's been going by "Mike" for 30 years.

It took me until I was a sophomore in high school before I could reliably spell my own name correctly.

The way that people usually botch it is "Micheal," which is weird because it doesn't improve on the situation.

My two cents - Mykel