How to Curse Without Cursing

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Reader Comments (13)

Technical terminology is by far my favorite method. Most people don't know how to respond to someone calling them heterosexually impaired.

December 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDavid Bennett

don't mean to sound incompitent here . . . what does that mean?

February 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterizzy_wolfe_13

LOL! David Bennett! XDD

March 13, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterqueen amidala pixiestyx

you forgot one. curse in foreign languages.
bonjour piece de merde.
wie gehts dir arschloch?
adios cabron

May 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJay Walkerke

I just replace words in compound insults. You son of mother.

July 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAlan T.

I just replace words in compound insults. You son of a mother.

July 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAlan T.

Personally, my favorite option is to just punch them in the throat. It work's wonders as both a greeting and a farewell! Mostly because regardless of how you use it, if you do it hard enough you don't have to talk to them for a while!

July 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterN

Just reading through your archive. I had to pause and comment on this one though all the others made me howl with laughter.

I curse in foreign launguages which gives the additional bit of silence as my ever curious friends grab a language dictionary to find out what I said, giving me toime to escape. I do the same with techinical terminology, so often now, that my friends have fianlly given up tryign to figure out what tehy mean and say...
'You're insulting me, aren't you?'


April 11, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterArysthae

I use reverse psychology to put a spin on my curses to insult the person without actually cursing by making them essentially making them insult themselves and has the bonus of the person not even realizing it if they aren't particularly bright

October 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBuckshot

I use large words or literal terminology.

"Hey, you insignificant pustule! How the copulatory are you!"

November 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAtari

Make them think:
I don't give a f---. Reply: So your kids aren't your own? or if they are single: So no one will have you eh?
I don't give a sh--. Recommend a good laxative to them.
If you are a man and they call you a mother f---er. If you have kids reply: Why yes, my wife and I do engage in such activity. If you don't have kids idndignantly reply: Hey, we're trying alright!

October 31, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterYasumi

I still believe that uttering random words from a dictionary in the old Haddock way works perfectly. "Abecedarians! Iconoclasts! Lubberscums! Macrocephalic baboons! Steamrollers! Vermicellis! Bodysnatchers! Fourlegged Cyranos! Kleptomaniacs!..."

August 14, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterBelgian comics fangirl

No, no. You just have to shout normal German at them. E.g., "Wasser ist der Tod von Obst und Schildkröten".

September 8, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJust Me
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