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Everyone says, "Just be yourself," but they don't mean it...
You know I had to have a conversation not entirely unlike that with a guy I used to work with. He didn't seem to get that no, the people complaining weren't "overly sensitive," he did actually have horrible gag inducing onion BO. He just didn't notice it the way others did because he got used to it through exposure.
Eventually he had to be reminded that keeping himself clean and presentable was part of the listed requirements of the job, and that being incapable of meeting the job requirements was grounds for dismissal.I was a little disappointed he actually started to wear deodorant, because I didn't much like the guy to begin with.
@Spat-O-Doom Did this man claim to have karate-chopped a tree down with his bare hands? Did he once say that he was refused a lottery ticket minutes before the drawing even though he had the winning numbers written down? Was he once fired from his job because he was "too good? If so, I too did not much like working for him, but when he one of many to be laid off and one of few to not be re-hired, I shed no tears. Nor did my nose.
"See that? It just called me creepy!" That's comedy gold, that is.
NH: Yes. Yes it is.
Last line - so true...
We had 2 people around here like that.
The first would much on onions all day. She was OLD and would get up and walk around the office with her walker. Releasing onions fumes and other "gasses" the whole way - kind of rocket propelled her. Thank the Big Guy she retired.
The other one is still here. She is hygenically challenged. Showers/bathes seasonally. Has people abandoning their cubes when she goes by, the smell is just awful. The best airfresheners just slow down the smell long enough to give you time to escape. We are discussing lobbing a few Febreze grenades in her cube one day...
The purpose of law is to create criminals. Anyone who does not understand this will never be truly free.
Society is compromise. Anyone who does not understand this will always be alone.
I love the final line. Brilliant.
Scott, it's been a long time since you posted a rerun. I've noticed, and am appreciative!
Also, your head calling him creepy. Great stuff.
Obviously, Jenkins needs to pull his head out. I love weapons - big, honkin' semi-automatic and automatic guns. Bazookas, machine guns, hand grenades, Howitzers, trench knives, fighter jets, you name it. That doesn't mean I get to go around shoving them in people's faces.
Society *can't* change your behavior. It can merely threaten you with sufficiently persuasive retribution. Still your choice.
Had a coworker like that at a factory; he would shower on Sundays, so Mondays, nobody minded sitting next to him. Tuesdays, you could ignore the smell. By Wenesday, people would lean away when he reached for supplies at the far side of his bench. Thursdays, people would make excuses to move to other spots on the line, and Fridays had people who sat near him calling in sick.The boss took some persuading to have a talk with him because his desk wasn't anywhere nearby. I don't know why we're so shy about talking to people about this, especially this guy - he was from some country where everybody bathes once a week, so they're all used to it, and he had no idea he was making us uncomfortable.I'm with NF; third panel punchline is pure gold!
@ khereva wrote: "Society *can't* change your behavior. It can merely threaten you with sufficiently persuasive retribution. Still your choice."
"Sir, would you prefer to be executed by firing squad, or by being hanged?"
I kinda miss the practical day-to-day Basic Instructions...
I'm old, cynical and world-wise. I rarely even smirk.
Panel three made me laugh out loud.
Genius, that is.
I haven't even looked at panel 4 yet. I'm going to save that for tomorrow.
"My armpits are not pleasant, but they are honest." - haha best line ever.