How to Succeed on Your Own Terms

Thanks as always for using my Amazon Affiliate links (USUKCanada).

« How to Join a Team | How to Handle Being "Thrown Under the Bus" »

Reader Comments (31)

Love the front-facing fanny pack. A public pouch?

January 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGawain

Thank you for bringing back the goofball motivational speaker. Seeing him thwarted makes me happy.

I really want to see one with the motivational speaker and the angry client. And then one with the motivational speaker and Rick. I don't anticipate any of these going better for the speaker, but we the readers will all win.

January 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLummox JR

I answered one of these things as a sociopath once as a form of protest back in college. Kinda came back to bite me later.

January 22, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterbaardvark

Will motivational speaker have a super-hero alter ego?

January 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMichael

I've got to say I like the dress code at, what is it, Mullet-Corp? We dress like that where I work, but it's a blue collar technical facility where we have almost no direct contact with customers. For an office, Scott's imaginary job seems pretty relaxed.

We have a personality type test, too. It's known as working with people long enough to know what to expect from them.

January 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMarco

I'm not sure I would know which answers would indicate I was a sociopath. Maybe that means I am one. Oh dear.

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAnne

I answered a big one of these a few years ago. Answered all questions as accurately and honest as I could.
Apparantly I'm a very aggressive, authoritarian, incompassionate alturist. I asked what that meant (since I scored max on alturism, but apparantly was very willing to kill people to further my goal of helping humanity). The psychologist said it was what he'd expected Stalin would score.
I hope I'm better now.

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterwickedragon

Hi Gawain

( qoute: Love the front-facing fanny pack. A public pouch?)

Do you mean pubic pouch? If so, I like it - it's rude.

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPaddy

I answered these things like a total nut back in the army, so they decided to make me an officer.

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterM

"We'll never know" for the win!

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMikey

Athena is really just a rebellious teenager!

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCaulairdis

Athena is also an expensive Weatherby shotgun. Coincidence? I think not...

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterR. Dan

The motivational speaker is an awesome character.

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterK7

I suppose Mullet Boss scored high on the "guillible" portion of the test?

On a side note, thank you Scott for the Amazon link that suggests many people buy all three of your books together. If it's a good enough choice for lots of people that I don't know, then it's a good enough choice for me!

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJittery

"Will motivational speaker have a super-hero alter ego?"

No, he is a super villian.

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterFrank

Hey Gawain and Paddy, a "front facing fanny-pack" could still accurately be described as as a "fanny-pack" if the wearer is British and female. In Britain a "fanny" is not a buttocks, but is slang for "vagina." [insert "The More You Know" gif here]

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJohncraig

@Michael: More likely a supervillain.

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

Reminds me of when a company I was with did the FISH Program (which comes from the fish market in Pike Place Market in Seattle). Management spent thousands to learn 4 obvious tenets of running a business. I abused the system for my own amusement.

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTlalocW

If only I can take a personality test and answer things to look like a middle finger.

Awesome comic again, Scott

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterRaestloz

"Front-facing fanny pack". AKA "Scrote tote".

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterjon

I got tested when I was 10, in elementary school. The tester called my mother in alarm; "I asked her to draw a girl, and she drew herself sitting in a chair, facing away! she's turning her back on the world!"
My mother asked me about this. I answered "They're always saying 'you won't be graded on this, and then grading and judging. He said 'draw *a girl*'. I can't draw faces or hands, so I tried to reproduce the sketch a classmate of mine did awhile back of the girl sitting in front of her, because that angle didn't involve a face or hands." My mother tore the tester a new one for giving her child (and only her child, it wasn't a whole class thing) psychological tests without parental permission, and for being enough of an idiot to think a ten year old in a messed-up school system is going to respond exactly the same as a four year old when you say "draw a girl".
It was a beautiful thing to listen to!

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDee

Mullet boss predictably hired a motivational speaker that reminds him of himself - they both inspire unity of purpose in the employees that is tangential or hostile to their desired goals.

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered Commentertimocracy

It's a cod piece, you fools!

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterRosie

Oh dear. I wanted to mess up the test, but knew that they would know... which kind of means, if they already knew what my personality was, why were they paying someone to have me take a test on it...

Also, I want to hang this up at work but suspect it would be seen as troublesome.


January 23, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterandipandi


January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAidan

As an aspiring supervillain myself, I take umbrage at the idea of this weenie becoming one. Still, perhaps he'd make an interesting foe for the Human Joke Knifeketeer.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLummox JR

Aidan - I refer you to here:

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterIron Donkey

The last time I took one of these personality tests, they told me to skip the questions that made me feel uncomfortable. So I didn't answer any of them. The results: I'm an INTJ.

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTheMortallyWounded


Bah! Yes, how did I mistype that? What does that count as...a "Victorian Slip"?

January 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGawain

Worry not, Gawain. As You can see from my post, I mistyped loads of stuff (actually, I think that the computer changes stuff when I'm not looking - yours probably does the same. They resent it because we are in charge even though we are less clever, in cybernetic terms)

And Johncraig - I'm British - I know what a 'fanny' is, thank you, but it is a term that no lady would use in mixed company when referring to her 'front bottom'. :)

January 28, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPaddy

Wow, I had to take one of these at a former job... we all thought it was a waste of time and money (which, ultimately, I think even the bosses must have realized, but I've moved on and don't really know nor care). If only I'd thought about the 'middle finger' plotting of the results, I would have tried like crazy to have made it so!

February 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCR
Editor Permission Required
You must have editing permission for this entry in order to post comments.