How to Give Performance Notes

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Reader Comments (31)

I had problems with girls until I started acting like I didn't care. In High School, the thing that worked most was saying "Hey, let's go make out." and they gave a reluctant yes.

I have no experience outside of high school though, so if you try my line, go to your local High School.

July 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAdam

Have you been spying on me?

July 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMatt

is this the first time you're referred to by name in the strip? I think it is!

July 26, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterray friesen

One of my favorites in a while. "Humpification process" is my new secret weapon of flirtation.

July 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDavii

Her name is Athena?! I... think that's pretty cool, actually. Though it's a lot to live up to.

July 26, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterjoshquixote

My favorites this time:
Panel 2: "This time Scott's here to watch!"
Panel 4: "Not if you want them to like you."

Still chuckling as I type this. Keep it up, Scott!

July 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDefinitely

Athena? She's just a girl.

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterpolicomic

Of course, now he's just going to be standing next to her, staring, not saying a word...

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMRL

Oh, man ... I know someone who needs to see this. Perhaps with his face pasted over Jenkins' ...

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRebekah

The only line that ever works is "Can I buy you a drink or do you just want the money?". That said, it only works about once every five years...

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPeter Andersson

Man, only a hopeless fool would ever degrade "humpification" by referring to it as a "process."

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJudas Peckerwood

'Nubile.' *shudder*

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEmma

Hey a new avatar on my BI favorites link!

Great job on the new site!

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAmorim

"Humpification process"?!? Does Jenkins by any chance share Pete and Dud's fascination with "busty substances"?

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterE. L. Wisty

hey Scott, could you make the links stand out a little more compared to the barely-perceptible darker pixels and mouse-over underlining?

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDerek

Note: she decided within ten seconds of meeting you whether or not she was willing to sleep with you. Her decision to do so on any occasion is solely contingent upon the status she believes this will confer upon her relative to the status of other females she knows. You are a mere token in this social calculus, and beyond it, you barely exist at all. Anything you do or say will be held up to derision by her amongst her social circle.

You cannot win. You cannot break even. You cannot quit the game.

Isn't sex fun?

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterkhereva

Maybe I just missed a ton of comics, but it seems like you're finally giving out names. This is the first time I heard Athena. In fact, it's the first time I heard you referred to as Scott.

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTheMortallyWounded

*snrk* "Humpification process". I'm going to start using that one.

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHugh Yeman

Perfect line: "Hello. I find you attractive and would like to get to know you better."

Works sometimes.

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKJ

Wait, isn't Jenkins supposed to be in a badly-committed relationship? Is he unsuccessfully cheating on the girlfriend he won't marry?

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLummox JR

This comic has used its best humpification process relentlessly on my sense of humor.

I think I like it.

July 27, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJesse

The sad thing is that this approach is subtle and sophisticated compared to what happens in many bars.

July 28, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnne

How did you manage to only meet the most pathetic, shallow women in existence, to exclusion of all others? Is there a geographical location where they all congregate, and do you have the misfortune of living there? ...Seriously though, stop trying to get laid at bars. Your life will improve substantially.

July 28, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterZoe

This reminded me of "Hothead Paisan - Homicidal Lesbian Terrorist" for some reason.

Maybe her line 'thank god, thank god, thank GOD I'm queer'.

July 28, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRobert

What's up with the link to the next comic?

I think (hope, pray) I have it fixed. Some of the code is permanently jacked. ~Missy

August 1, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterlerk

@Adam: You figured out that it takes being a horrible person to succeed long before the rest of us, and for that I envy you.

January 1, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterckls

So the next comic link is screwed. I can't skip to the next one through the archives because they're indexed ONLY by title for some reason, and I obviously don't know what the next comic is, not having read it yet. I can't even get there by manually entering the url because again the comic urls are based on the title. Anyone with a less benighted browser want to post a link to the next one down here?

Next one from here is this comic. I see that the "next" and "previous" links are in really weird places on this one, but they still work as links in Chrome. Hmmmmm. ~Missy

February 27, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHalykan

The link that Missy gave goes to the previous comic, I think. Unless, of course, I am reading in the wrong direction? Or maybe my Firefox is playing tricks on me?


link to the one *I* think of as "next":

March 2, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterclh

There has never been a black guy on this strip. Or an Asian. Or a Native American. Or any minority really.

Note from Scott: I don't make a big deal about race in the comic. I don't do jokes about it, so the subject just doesn't come up. While I don't base the personalities of my characters on the people their looks are copied from, almost all of my characters do correspond to a real person, and for the most part, I think of them as being the race of the person they are modeled on. As such, there are regular characters who are Jewish, Mexican, Pacific Islander and Indian.

I admit to the lack of Asians and African Americans. That was an oversight when I first started the comic, and it's hard to get new people to pose for source photos, since I have to make them sign a release and have a discussion about how everyone in my comic is a jerk.

Any volunteers?

January 14, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMe

Your next-previous links on this page are broken.

October 20, 2014 | Unregistered Commentertlhonmey

The next and previous links are STILL broken. Whatever you click on it highlights the entire thing and goes to the actual previous comic. The one Missy linked to 2 years ago is that previous comic. Thank you to clh for providing the actual "next" link, I was actually kind of worried about how I'd go on from here...

July 1, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterHeather
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