You should buy mayonnaise in egg shells, olive oil bottles and lemon skins.
Great comic, Scott. I'm very disappointed to see there were more responses to the first comment that actual comments about the comic in the comments. Of course you realize you're now going to have to do an instruction on "How to Refurbish Chocolates"... :)
Well, we can get our mayonnaise in three different sizes. The smallest is a handful of mayonnaise - the name is as descriptive as it gets, and it is just enough for most single meal needs, provided you can outrun the attacking mayonnaise-hungry seagulls, and remember not to shake hands with someone out of a habit (a really messy situation if that happens) on your way home.
Next one is an ungalvanized bucket. Enough for any and all meals in case of a large gathering of friends and relatives, and the bucket is very convenient to swing at muggers and Jehovah's Witnesses who might see you as an easy target due to the fact that one of your hands is taken by the bucket. Swing it with enough momentum, and you won't spill any mayonnaise. This might require some practice, though - prefferably outdoors, far away from people who might, for some reason, find a person flailing a bucket with mayonnaise around to be a sufficient reason to call police or a mental institution.
Then, for those with enormous amount of hungry friends, intention to somehow produce LSD from mayonnaise in their basement using their grandpa's recipe, or absolutely no cooking skills whatsoever, there's the wheelbarrow of mayonnaise. Very handy, though you must try not to push it too fast, or you'll lose most of the stuff at the first turn. Also, this packaging is a pain if you live downhill from the shop, and even more so, if you have to push it uphill. And, again, seagulls...
Seriously, though, I'm from Europe, and apart from jars and plastic bottles of mayonnaise I've seen only plastic bags of it - and glass jars are slowly taking over the, um, mayonnaise packaging industry, so it's certainly nothing unheard of.
The middle three lines of the last panel: The truest and most insightful words I've heard in some time.
As for the mayonnaise discussion. To all you Americans: I'm fairly certain mayonnaise is sold in jars for the most part in Europe too. I know it is in Denmark at least.Here in Norway, however, it is not. It is sold both in tubes - like toothpaste - and in slim plastic bags the size of your palm. i.e. In significantly smaller portions.
"It's a gift. Its job is to make your <significant other> happy." I might have to print this on little cards to give to the relationship-challenged. So simple, yet such a valuable lesson for both genders.
Thank you for using "it's" and "its" properly. For some reason it's/its and affect/effect drive me crazy.
First posting mayonnaise troll successfully derailed this comment thread.
To the Europeans responding: Thanks for the clarifications and to Baltic for the humor. Now I wonder how many will repeat the humor to their kids just for fun. I know I will.
wait, so what does your mayo come in? boxes? or do you just make it yourselves?
i'm not making fun of you, i'm just really curious about what sort of circumstances lead to finding jarred mayo odd.
Baltic: FTW!!! You rock!!! Willa: thanks for the info. I knew mustard came in toothpaste tubes, so mayonaise that way sounds only slightly strange. But bags??? ewwwww . . .
Refurbished chocolates are what they sell in the shop at chocolate factories.
In the UK we used to have a British chocolate manufacturer called "Cadbury's" (they've gone now - bought out and shut down) who had a huge factory in the Midlands. They had a shop that sold my favourite sweets: Misshapes. A big bag of random expensive chocolates in defective shapes for pennies.
Over here mayo is mostly sold in collapsible tubes made from aluminium.
Of course you can buy your oil-egg-and-mustard condiments in glass jars as well, but those never seem to work for me. I was, of course, joking.^^
Roger- I too live near the Russell Stover factory in Kansas. Small world. We used to go there and get irregular stuff all the time when I was kid.
Now with internet meme-y goodness:
In Europe, mayonnaise comes in bags.
"Over here mayo is mostly sold in collapsible tubes made from aluminium.
Of course you can buy your oil-egg-and-mustard condiments in glass jars as well, but those never seem to work for me. I was, of course, joking.^^"
At last! Dorian speaks! I find the idea of mayonnaise in a tube to be -- unappetizing, though perhaps if I had the opportunity to use it, I would not consider it so.
I actually prefer the plastic squeeze-bottles more convenient to use, but the mayonnaise is a bit thinner and not quite as tasty.