How to Tell What Kind of Monster You Are Dating: Volume 2

What can I say. This particular rabbit hole goes down a bit further than I had anticipated.
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Reader Comments (30)

Please tell me there is going to be a part 3.

July 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCBS

My wife says that if you ever decide to highlight how monsters are like women, you should mention the harpy and the banshee.

July 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjaklumen

That second woman isn't Rick.... Is (s)he???

July 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjoe

I asked Captain Pike if I was the Mummy (slow, unkempt, not very talkative). He agreed with my wife.

July 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterfordsfords

Women too, you say?

Mermaids would entice lonely men with sweet words, then take everything they owned and leave them for dead.

Yeah, I can see the correlation.

July 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLockeZ

I can't wait to see the female version, although I would understand if you don't dare to do it hehehe.

July 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFrancesc

Wondering what the Wolfman would be like? Probably annoying trying to clean all the hair out of your carpets, stopping him from drinking from the toilet and barking at the neighbours...

We just did a comic on what the Hulk is like at spaceavalanche... poor Betty.

July 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSpaceAvalanche

I personally have a lot in common with the Bride of Frankenstein.

July 20, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterwarrior two

Female Monster Dates:
THE ALIEN - eats you alive, breeds like a mother
50 FOOT WOMAN - klutzy, overemotional, jealous as all hell gets out, doesn't know her own strength
FEMALE WEREWOLF - overly ravenous and sexual appetites, will turn on you on a button or next full moon
SHE-HULK - she's green, radioactive and tears both your arms off without notice. You should see what's she's like when it's that time of the month.
CAT WOMAN - not a monster, per se, but a demented villainesse with a penchant for skin-tight catsuits, talking like cat, turning on men on a dime and scratching the living hell out of their faces and backs.
DEVIL WOMAN - a Robert Crumb creation, I'd sooner stick my privates in a nest of pure plutonium than mess with this hornet's nest of hormones and overt sexuality.

Let's not forget the Leech Woman who needs the juice from a male pineal gland to stay young and vivacious. Otherwise she becomes old and unattractive and, therefore, evil.

July 20, 2009 | Unregistered Commentersnowdog

And Godzilla... always seems to be getting 'involved' with other monsters.

July 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMattF

Didn't take long for the "women are bad too" chorus to chime in. Weasels much?

July 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEric RoM

These are mostly comic book characters, not exactly monsters. And it seems like most of their worst characteristics are sexual. "overt sexuality", "ravenous sexual apetites". You could say the same for many male characters.

July 20, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdancingbean

1st and 3rd panel were the funniest for me.

Regarding women monsters, don't forget the Medusa. And the classic witch, of course (interesting, you don't see too many negative witch characters these days, though that used to be quite common).

@Eric RoM: If we're to have equality of the sexes, I think that we must also be able to humorously skewer both of them equally.

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEsn

Panel 2 was funniest, because it combines a dating joke with the running joke about the mullet- haired boss. I love the way the cape was draped "roundly" around his normal suit. He didn't need much modification to be a vampire. Just be himself.

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteramber

This is off topic. Just part of an email I got from a friend. I'm guessing I find BI funny and think this is funny so you all may etc. etc. etc. He is planning on buying a cheap commuter bike.

I had a detailed look at the £70 bike.
It looked OK. and I tried it out. they had a BMX bike also which was much smaller and lighter.
I wanted to buy the BMX bike, but my wife said, it will be like an circus elephant, riding a circus bike in a circus ( man she does sound like my manager giving feedback at the time of performance apprisals).
Having received that positive feedback, I bought the £70 one.

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMike Geordie Brown

The 'women are nasty toooo' jokes would be funnier if they were, you know, funny? Rather than being cheap and obvious?

Not to mention that it kinda misses the point: with few exceptions, female mosters are stereotypes of women by virtue of being created by men as expressions of their own mysogyny. So it's hardly clever to point out the ways in which they reflect such attitudes.

Observing how most mosters can be interpreted as parodies of male behaviour is less expected. Hence the funny.

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterouteast

"it will be like an circus elephant, riding a circus bike in a circus" So, did you ask her what's the down side?

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMike

Weasels much? <---WTF? Grammar often?

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered Commentersnowdog

LOL beautifully played

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPetra

The problem with all of the male comments regarding female monsters is that it's not at the heart of BI, which is Scott making fun of HIMSELF and the men he knows who are willing to be skewered. It's in bad taste to tell jokes about a party you are not a member of (remember "Ethiopia jokes" and hey, even "Pollack jokes"?). I myself am a blonde woman, and I believe I'm ALLOWED to tell blonde jokes because I'm a member of that group. No matter that I have a high IQ. No matter that MOST of the blonde women I know have high IQ's. We're blonde, and that's why we're allowed to tell the jokes. But if you, an otherwise intelligent man, tell me a blonde joke, I'm going to be offended. You're skewering ME, not YOU. If Scott were to do a "part 3" that covers female monsters, it would HAVE to be because MISSY gave him "permission" (?) or at least the ideas for the monsters she may exemplify.

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBI Fan

Thanks for explaining the Comedy Rules, BI Fan! Next time I need advice on what is or is not appropriate to joke about or laugh at, I know where to find it! Do your services also include telling me what I'm allowed to think?

July 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThe Great White Snark

But a comic can always skewer The Boss. That is allowed, even encouraged, though a comic may not be a member of that group. This is because The Mullet Haired Boss is an oppressor. Good insights, though :)

July 22, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteramber

LOL. Monsters We?

July 22, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteramber

I am oppressed by females, so I can call the monsters as I see them.

»^..^« »gasp-smack-gasp«

Then I'm a Sphinx. Answer my question wrong and you meet a terrible fate. Am I fat?

July 22, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteramber

HA! @amber, your female monster is the only funny one in this comment stream!

July 23, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterfordsfords

Fordsfords, you are too kind. :D

July 24, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteramber

*cackles* It's a *wonderful* rabbit hole, and I like you.

July 18, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTe
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