How to End a One-Sided Conversation

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Reader Comments (51)

Hm. This is true. Tee hee. Now I know how to bother my boyfriend.

May 9, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLily

rotary valves are not reserved for bass trombones. while bass trombones do have two rotary valves, the 'bones that have just one are better than a "straight tenor" in that the player may hit the valve to play any sixth-position note in first position. it's a lot less arm work, and sometimes necessary if you need to play a 6th-position note (usually c) in quick succession with some first-second-third postion notes.

May 11, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterd3phext

I played trombone. I guess I'm not offended because I gave it up out of boredom. But I do appreciate the instrument. So I'll just say two things about it.

1. It's got a wonderful sound. But only when played well.

2. It's an ensemble instrument. Unless you're a kickass jazz trombonist, it's best played amidst and band or orchestra with 10+ members.

Telling someone they need to learn to play trombone is like saying that everyone needs to become a shortstop. Yet another reason why mullet-boss is a douche`.

November 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRadien

You're not supposed to sympathize with Scott. He's a jackass - that's what makes it funny. It's "oblivious meets impotently sarcastic".

January 22, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterhistoryman68

each and every one of you who comment got trolled or are having a one-sided conversation.

just saying.

[memo from management: dont feed the trolls]

May 3, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterpiscesmended

I knew a girl in high school who sprained her arm while playing trombone. For the record, every joke that came out of the incident came from her, not anyone else.

May 27, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSamantha

Every time you mention the trombone, you're setting up a dick joke. This should tell you something. Of course, I played the &%#(@& flute, so I must step back and let others cast stones for me.

July 17, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTe

Just going to say that I play the trombone, and I definitely picked it because it was easy. Fucking woodwind instruments with all their holes.

August 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMrGuy

The valve trombone is a joke, and a bad one. And while I've played the trombone for 10 years now, there's not denying the rapid increase in masturbation jokes starting from high school and into college.

February 14, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTheCharles

Fact: Playing a non-wind instrument is about the easiest thing you can do, excluding the piano and its relatives on the basis of their sheer complexity. The hard part about playing the guitar is making it look difficult, not actually playing it.

November 11, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMe

My solution to a one-sided conversation is to just say increasingly random things until they notice the discrepancy.

March 15, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterFelicity
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