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Reader Comments (51)

Hah! I always like masturbation jokes.

Um ... uh ... it's because I almost never need them! Um ... and never did! Or something...

Anyway, looks like uclick has another BI iPhone app - "Basic Instructions 2", of which the app description assures us, "Scott Meyer has gone through and painstakingly selected his favorites for the second collection of Basic Instructions comics." Painstakingly? Isn't this supposed to be a Labor of Love? Well, at least if I don't find all of my personal favorites in there, I'll know that my taste is vastly superior to yours. (A reminder - the app contains a specific set of comics so you can view them without Internet connectivity; it does not give you access to the latest comics.)

April 29, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterfordsfords

heeeeeeyyyyyy....I PLAYED TROMBONE!!!


April 29, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEvilScienceChick

There's a whole separate category of jokes you must hear then.

April 29, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBobisOnlyBob

Let me guess, the appropriate thing to say in panel 1 would have been "make him learn the electric guitar"? <_<

This is the first comic where I was actually on the boss's side.

April 29, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEsn

That really hurt. As a trombone player, that just hurt me. Does valve trombone include bass?

April 29, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterIsaac

Panel 4 could be a little more, well, subtle. But I still laughed :-).

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGrant

An appropriate (and not-funny) thing for the boss to say in the first panel would have been something like, "Make him read the classics", or learn violin or piano if it must be a musical instrument; trombone is just funny because, when one generally thinks of the repertoire of a "Renaissance Man", one does not tend to think of the trombone - and yet, some might argue that it *should* be thought of in that category, despite the inherent comic value of the trombone. Anyways, it's very subtle, and I understood it.
( I play electric guitar, and yeah, um, believe me, most of my fellow electric-guitarists are, in my experience, low-brow types).

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterZedolor

Nah, panel 4 is just fine. He was trying to be abruptly blunt after the other more subtle conversation exit strategies failed.

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterePants

People in other offices are wondering why I am laughing so loud so early. Thanks.

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTyler

Damn, every panel an LOL! No waiting for the panel 4 punch line. Oh, and I learned my "something new" for today: That a trombone has a valve! I thought it just had a slide. Scott, you're just a font of information. Where do you come up with this stuff?

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterI am Tubby, yes.

"when one generally thinks of the repertoire of a “Renaissance Man”, one does not tend to think of the trombone"

I don't see why not. The trombone has a really wide repertoire going back hundreds of years to the Renaissance era. It even used to be well-known for playing sacred music.

Sorry, but to me this comic is pretty tasteless, the equivalent of picking on the nerdy kid in class. And no, I don't play the trombone, but I'm a fan of classical and jazz music, and I don't like the ignorance and casual scorn displayed here.

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEsn

"Sorry, but to me this comic is pretty tasteless, the equivalent of picking on the nerdy kid in class. And no, I don’t play the trombone, but I’m a fan of classical and jazz music, and I don’t like the ignorance and casual scorn displayed here."

Wow. Grow a sense of humor.

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLaminar

OK, I played Trombone...and do find this funny. The only thing I take exception to is the "didn't get you many girls" comment. For some reason, most trombone players I know didn't have a problem. Maybe girls like long slides (sorry, couldn't resist). See, most of the tasteless jokes were ones we made up ourselves!!

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDave

OK, upon reflection...and remembering ALL of the trombone players I knew, I guess its more of a 50-50 proposition....but that's pretty good for us band geeks. I'll withhold comment on where I fall...but my h.s. gf thought I was a good kisser...has to do with how you play brass instruments.

Anyway, as I think about it, having the boss be a trombone player is actually perfect!! heh.

PS: sorry for all the "..."; not sure why I can't stop with the ellipses; I'm not even really using them correctly. Oh well...

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDave

I think you're all focusing too much on the choice of instrument. The real truth of this comment is people who will ramble on and on at a clearly unwilling audience about a topic they could not possibly care less about. Not that this happens to me at work on a regular basis. At least not involving trombones. Though that certainly be one of the few ways the stories could be more tedious.

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRev Matt

“when one generally thinks of the repertoire of a 'Renaissance Man', one does not tend to think of the trombone”

Back then, it was called a "Sackbut"

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterStCredZero

Hilarious! I think it's clear that there is no ignorance displayed here by Scott, because there is more literal ignorance in the comments. The fact most people seem to be ignorant of is that there are two types of trombone, apart from the different voices like tenor and whatnot. There is the slide trombone, which changes pitch by sliding in and out to lengthen the tube. Then there is the valve trombone, that works like a trumpet, with little valves to open lengthening chambers in a way similar to the way binary numbers work. Purists see that as "cheating", of course, because the slide trombone takes a good ear to play. That Scott would know this betrays no small knowledge of trombones.

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBill

I thought that guy might be a trombonist. i played the trumpet. we had to sit in front of those jokers. you know there is a spit valve at the end of the slide. jerks.

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChris

me too, but mine is all worn out now. hee hee

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJames Yeamans

How can you not enjoy casual scorn??? Good God, have you never heard any trombone jokes?

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMatt

Can it be that Scott might be a tromboner himself?

Sorry, that's offensive to all those who tromboned.

I just can't stop. Seriously though... did you play the trombone, Scott?

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMatt

As a trombone player, Awesome comic! Hilarious! I'm printing these out for the rest of the guys in the section for the gig next Tuesday night.

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAaron

I think Scott's next book collection needs to be called 'casual scorn' that made me laugh like crazy.

The comic did too, my dad played the trombone as a kid, and was by all accounts horrible and everyone hated him. I like how our hero has to retract his 'interesting' thoughts to himself, never mind if he was saying it out loud.

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterray friesen

Clearly Scott played trombone himself and just doesn't like to talk about. I don't blame him. I don't like to admit it, but I played the trombone. Although I'm not sure that what I did technically qualifies as 'playing' since I rarely produced anything recognizable as music. But I did enjoy blowing spit on the back of the trumpet players' heads!

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBlackkllab

I am sad these cartoons don't have soundtracks. Because this one's would be excellent.

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRoger

as well as the interesting info re: trombones, i'm taking away the phrases 'tromboner' and 'casual scorn', which i first read as 'casual scone'. both versions tickle my vocabulary bone.

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterwhiterabbit11

thank God my parents, conservative southern baptists that they were, had the common sense to let their pre-teen son play drums in band and then got him a black washburn flying v for christmas when he turned 16! of course, my first band was called something like United By Hate and my most "successful" band was called Vomit we can all see where THAT leads.

April 30, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJiggly McSickfingers

There are only two types of men in this world: those who play their trombone and those who lie about it.

May 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTitanius Inglesmith

after reading this yesterday, i had nightmeres about marching bands.

May 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTriad

The true trombonist is cool and can take the mockery. Well-blown warm trombone can get you laid, though not nearly so easily as a sousaphone. The ladies love that big bad brassnecked sooze ;)
Now I think of it, it wouldn't surprise me if Scott pulled his wife with some jam-hot sousaphone skills.

May 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMatt

In my experience, it's downright amazing how ineffective the shoulder-turned silent treatment can be, to one stoutly resistant to hints.

May 2, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterj hiro

I played trumpet only briefly in h.s. then switched to flute; never had thoughts pro or con "tromboners" but I find ALL of these comments HI-larious! Brass musician or no, Scott, clearly knows of what he "speaks" and knows how to push the buttons of SO MANY without a sense of humor. This just makes me giggle even more. Thank you, Scott. I look forward to tomorrow!

May 2, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBI Fan

AMAZING. Giving that to the assistant band director/trombone instructor at my school. I love the third panel. "Or to make good music, for that matter"

May 2, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLily

Saxophone > All Else.

May 2, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLily

Tromboner is a bad term. My friends always shorten it by taking off the trom. And then I get confused about what we're talking about.

May 2, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLily

Only some trombones have valves. Some have piston (trumpet) valves. These are for the weak. Rotary valves (the awesome kind) are only for bass trombone. The best type of trombone ever.

May 2, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterIsaac

Ew. Saxophones are like transvestite: they dress like brass, but play like woodwinds. So, not only do they fail, but they lie about it.

May 2, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterIsaac

I will not out-geek both the trombone players and the ones making fun of them.

The only cool trombone player was Commander William Riker of the Starship Enterprise on The Next Generation.

Thank you.

May 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTlalocW

Maybe you haven't noticed, but this comic does its share of making fun of nerds, too. Perhaps" rel="nofollow">Count Your Sheep would be more your speed?

May 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNathaniel
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