...I'll tell you what I'd like *you* to do with your Toblerone bar
You certainly thought of that and discarded it for being overly naughty and obvious. Yet, I feel it's the imposing version. Isn't humour a lemon that begs for being squeezed? :-)
...rather a compelling version, I guess. Us non-native speakers have funny ways, sometimes. Hey, wait, I'm a bloody foreigner but I'm a native-speaker, too, come to think of it. But you get my drift... Humor ist, wenn man trotzdem lacht. No, I'm not fussy, why do you ask?
my family used to play monopoly regularly, until my english husband got into some weird intense grudge match with my cuz' german girlfriend. we all fell away, and indeed, fell asleep, but they continued. at 2am i had to take the pieces out of their nerveless fingers and proclaim the game a draw. we never played again...
My brother and I would play Monopoly. I hated it because he would ALWAYS win it. On the other hand, I loved RISK and he hated it because I would always win that. Both games are won decisively and losing is protracted. My brother threw the RISK board across the room several times growing up...I don't remember ever throwing the Monopoly board.
@ Whiterabbit - it's an English/German thing, don't worry about it.
As for being able to play monopoly and not losing freinds - there is only one thing to do, Do NOT open the box, put the box back in the cupboard and play something else.
I disagree... I think if RICK is the one doing *blank* with the bar, then he gets to exact his own revenge... plus, look at Rick's face - what's more "imposing" than being threatened with deadpan delivery? As it was a lead-in to the next line (sometimes, we have to read the whole thing to get the humor), it's perfect as written... maybe the point was to get YOU to fill in that blank...
Monopoly is still a lot more fun than Socialism, where all the properties are worthless and no one has money to buy them from the government anyway. Half of the spaces are "Go To Jail" and the other half are "Stand in lline for shoes and bread".
Maybe it's a matter of preferences: while I wouldn't mind at all getting my revenge, I'd much rather have my opponent do funny things with Toblerone bars to himself--helping in *that* process just isn't my cup of tea. But yes, the next line would need to be amended, it's implied: "That's your business, sir, but you'll be charged even if you don't eat it." Arguably, killing redundancy squeezes what needs squeezing even more effectively. Scott: just my 2c, the strip is fine, of course. I guess it's just a matter of two loyal fans being, um, anal about issues. However, if that's fine with your alter ego, who am I to object?
ah, yes, the memories of sore-losing family members... my father would always declare "EARTHQUAKE!" if we were playing a board game he'd gotten bored with... and we lived in Miami...
In my house if you went to the bathroom you were likely to be robbed, or your property to be taken because of "emanate domain" and given to someone else that could better use it.
...don't make me say dirty things in your native tongue and then quote Einsteurzende Neubauten lyrics at you....'cos that's about all I really COULD do.
ah Izzy, you should see our horrorshow of board games...all consist of a scrabble board and a bad idea, like the time we decided to allow esperanto and klingon slang terms...or the time we thought the all-hebrew version might be a fun idea...then there was strip scrabble, and of course scrabble, the drinking game...which became another version of strip scrabble, which became another game entirely. but it all beat the hell out of monopoly
please be careful in your sharing of your perverse versions of "good family fun" as miss izzy is still a minor child amongst us. but thanks for the fun, fab ideas for those of us who are of age! :)
when i was in college we would play 'star trek drunk' while watching the original series in reruns... ah, the joy of drinking shots to shatner's melodrama!
Just to clarify, my intent was that Ric was threatening to do something to me with the bar, but I turned it around as if he intended to do it to himself.
Monopoly was much much different after we really read the rules. A person lands on property. If s/he does not buy it, it immediately is up for auction to all players. So you lowball, then try to get other players to buy something they don't want...or you get it for cheap. A WHOLE non-luck strategy is in play.
[...] I used to love playing Monopoly when I was younger. With the group I was playing with things could get a bit heated since we were all very competitive and losing was not an option. It would have been nice to have this comic back then, How to win at monopoly without losing a friend. [...]
I just came across this strip, and I'm a bit confused. People win at Monopoly? Meaning, people actually successfully finish games of Monopoly? Surely you must be kidding.
Ah, this brought back memories of when my dad decided it was time he taught my sister and I Monopoly as kids: He fondly remembered playing it with his brothers, though "Somehow [his older brother] always won".
After setting up the board, Dad decided to read the rules, which he'd never read before as it was his older brother who taught him. I still remember it well:
The slowly fading smile... The sudden silence... My dad's shriek of rage when he descovered that his brother had been cheating all those years...
...and that, Dear Children, is how I learnt to cuss ;)
When I used to play, there was always that ONE person who had to be the "Banker", what a cop-out! No! You pick a game-piece, (I don't care if the only one left is the Thimble), and you suffer with the rest of us!
Reader Comments (37)
oh man, me and my brother would have 8 hour games sometimes. he will never let me forget about my mobile hotel ponsy scam
This comic reminds me why I hate Monopoly
...I'll tell you what I'd like *you* to do with your Toblerone bar
You certainly thought of that and discarded it for being overly naughty and obvious. Yet, I feel it's the imposing version. Isn't humour a lemon that begs for being squeezed? :-)
...rather a compelling version, I guess. Us non-native speakers have funny ways, sometimes. Hey, wait, I'm a bloody foreigner but I'm a native-speaker, too, come to think of it. But you get my drift... Humor ist, wenn man trotzdem lacht. No, I'm not fussy, why do you ask?
my family used to play monopoly regularly, until my english husband got into some weird intense grudge match with my cuz' german girlfriend. we all fell away, and indeed, fell asleep, but they continued. at 2am i had to take the pieces out of their nerveless fingers and proclaim the game a draw. we never played again...
...17-day-long game... Then I took the greens and yellows... Boardwalk/Park Place followed... Those poor people, they never stood a chance.
Ah! That's why I don't play monopoly anymore. Any luck bastard will continuously beat you for 3 or more hours.
My brother and I would play Monopoly. I hated it because he would ALWAYS win it. On the other hand, I loved RISK and he hated it because I would always win that. Both games are won decisively and losing is protracted. My brother threw the RISK board across the room several times growing up...I don't remember ever throwing the Monopoly board.
Thanks for the memories Scott.
That's why we called it "Monotony" in my house!
And I'm obviously clueless, but today I noticed the repeating background for the first time - very funny!
@ Whiterabbit - it's an English/German thing, don't worry about it.
As for being able to play monopoly and not losing freinds - there is only one thing to do, Do NOT open the box, put the box back in the cupboard and play something else.
*puts down box, backs away slowly* *Pulls out cross* May the power of christ compel you . . . to burn the game!
I disagree... I think if RICK is the one doing *blank* with the bar, then he gets to exact his own revenge... plus, look at Rick's face - what's more "imposing" than being threatened with deadpan delivery? As it was a lead-in to the next line (sometimes, we have to read the whole thing to get the humor), it's perfect as written... maybe the point was to get YOU to fill in that blank...
well, in that case, you better not pull out Trivial Pursuits either!
I will memorize these instructions and always do the opposite. It's much more fun.
You're right, Trivial Pursuit is just as bad.
It can get to the stage where just playing snap can become a full contact blood sport as well though.
Monopoly is still a lot more fun than Socialism, where all the properties are worthless and no one has money to buy them from the government anyway. Half of the spaces are "Go To Jail" and the other half are "Stand in lline for shoes and bread".
"...in Soviet Russia, Boardwalk build hotel on YOU!"
Maybe it's a matter of preferences: while I wouldn't mind at all getting my revenge, I'd much rather have my opponent do funny things with Toblerone bars to himself--helping in *that* process just isn't my cup of tea. But yes, the next line would need to be amended, it's implied: "That's your business, sir, but you'll be charged even if you don't eat it." Arguably, killing redundancy squeezes what needs squeezing even more effectively. Scott: just my 2c, the strip is fine, of course. I guess it's just a matter of two loyal fans being, um, anal about issues. However, if that's fine with your alter ego, who am I to object?
ah, yes, the memories of sore-losing family members... my father would always declare "EARTHQUAKE!" if we were playing a board game he'd gotten bored with... and we lived in Miami...
A strange game. The only winning move is not to play
In my house if you went to the bathroom you were likely to be robbed, or your property to be taken because of "emanate domain" and given to someone else that could better use it.
It made Monopoly a much tougher game.
SWEET! wish it was like that @ my house, . . . but NO!
Yep, this is exactly why I hated Monopoly! The being charged even if you don't eat it is priceless, though!
...don't make me say dirty things in your native tongue and then quote Einsteurzende Neubauten lyrics at you....'cos that's about all I really COULD do.
ah Izzy, you should see our horrorshow of board games...all consist of a scrabble board and a bad idea, like the time we decided to allow esperanto and klingon slang terms...or the time we thought the all-hebrew version might be a fun idea...then there was strip scrabble, and of course scrabble, the drinking game...which became another version of strip scrabble, which became another game entirely. but it all beat the hell out of monopoly
please be careful in your sharing of your perverse versions of "good family fun" as miss izzy is still a minor child amongst us. but thanks for the fun, fab ideas for those of us who are of age! :)
when i was in college we would play 'star trek drunk' while watching the original series in reruns... ah, the joy of drinking shots to shatner's melodrama!
Excellent Matthew Broderick movie reference
Just to clarify, my intent was that Ric was threatening to do something to me with the bar, but I turned it around as if he intended to do it to himself.
This was a great first panel.
Monopoly was much much different after we really read the rules. A person lands on property. If s/he does not buy it, it immediately is up for auction to all players. So you lowball, then try to get other players to buy something they don't want...or you get it for cheap. A WHOLE non-luck strategy is in play.
[...] I used to love playing Monopoly when I was younger. With the group I was playing with things could get a bit heated since we were all very competitive and losing was not an option. It would have been nice to have this comic back then, How to win at monopoly without losing a friend. [...]
I just came across this strip, and I'm a bit confused. People win at Monopoly? Meaning, people actually successfully finish games of Monopoly? Surely you must be kidding.
I agree. This comic explains in detail why people shouldn't play Monopoly.
If you want a cruel, demoralizing victory, at least play Settlers of Catan so it can be finished in under two hours.
Whenever I play monopoly, nobody EVER lands on a property and doesn't buy it, so that rule is pretty useless anyway =/
i love that last line
Ah, this brought back memories of when my dad decided it was time he taught my sister and I Monopoly as kids: He fondly remembered playing it with his brothers, though "Somehow [his older brother] always won".
After setting up the board, Dad decided to read the rules, which he'd never read before as it was his older brother who taught him. I still remember it well:
The slowly fading smile...
The sudden silence...
My dad's shriek of rage when he descovered that his brother had been cheating all those years...
...and that, Dear Children, is how I learnt to cuss ;)
Alas, but I am a speed loser too... But lets not go there. Great comic Scott!
When I used to play, there was always that ONE person who had to be the "Banker", what a cop-out!
No! You pick a game-piece, (I don't care if the only one left is the Thimble), and you suffer with the rest of us!