How to Create a Diversion

I’m no sports fan, so I may be way off base, but the fact that we call our game football just seems like pettiness on our part. The players barely ever touch the ball with a foot. There’s the kickoff and the extra point, and other than that they mostly clutch the ball to their chests with both arms. I suppose there was resistance to calling it “Bosom Ball.”

I think John Cleese was right when, on the Late Show with Steven Colbert, he said we should call American football “Giant Leather Egg Fight.”

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