How to Deal with Visions

I think dreams are about whatever you think they were about after the fact. They’re just a bunch of random images that your brain tries to make sense of. The real meaning isn’t in the dream, but in your interpretation of the images. Thus, I’ve decided that my recurring dreams where I’m still in school and have forgotten both my homework and my pants mean that I am a great guy, because I know deep down that I don’t need homework … or pants.

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How to Deal with Visions

I think dreams are about whatever you think they were about after the fact. They’re just a bunch of random images that your brain tries to make sense of. The real meaning isn’t in the dream, but in your interpretation of the images. Thus, I’ve decided that my recurring dreams where I’m still in school and have forgotten both my homework and my pants mean that I am a great guy, because I know deep down that I don’t need homework … or pants.

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As always, thanks for using my Amazon Affiliate links (US, UK, Canada).

How to Apply the Laws of Physics to Personal Relationships

I remember when I wrote this comic, Missy read the first panel and said, “That’s so lame.” That’s when I knew I’d struck a nerve!

Of course, the idea of using women’s revulsion at the idea of dating Rick to construct a motor is not practical. It would be much simpler to have women push a car and dangle Rick out on a pole behind them, like the opposite of a carrot on a stick.

Note from Missy: I don’t remember the comment Scott mentions above. I actually really like “I must destroy you.” I wish I had the temerity to say things like that in real life.

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How to Apply the Laws of Physics to Personal Relationships

I remember when I wrote this comic, Missy read the first panel and said, “That’s so lame.” That’s when I knew I’d struck a nerve!

Of course, the idea of using women’s revulsion at the idea of dating Rick to construct a motor is not practical. It would be much simpler to have women push a car and dangle Rick out on a pole behind them, like the opposite of a carrot on a stick.

Note from Missy: I don’t remember the comment Scott mentions above. I actually really like “I must destroy you.” I wish I had the temerity to say things like that in real life.

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As always, thanks for using my Amazon Affiliate links (US, UK, Canada).

How to Buy a Car

This comic is based directly on two different experiences I’ve had with car salesmen. Panel one comes from a time that I told a dealer that I was looking for a small hatchback with a manual transmission and air conditioning. He said, “I have just the thing,” and led me to a Chevy Beretta with an automatic transmission and no air.

Another time I told the salesman what I wanted to pay for the car, what interest rate I wanted, and how much I could put down. He wrote it all down then went to “discuss it with his manager.”

When he came back he said that he had good news, they could give me the car for a higher price, at a higher interest rate, and all I’d have to do was make a larger initial down payment.  I told him that this was not good news, and that he’d failed to deliver any of the things I’d wanted. He told me, “Sir, you have to be flexible.” I told him exactly what I say in the third panel of this comic, and to this day the memory of it makes me proud.

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How to Buy a Car

This comic is based directly on two different experiences I’ve had with car salesmen. Panel one comes from a time that I told a dealer that I was looking for a small hatchback with a manual transmission and air conditioning. He said, “I have just the thing,” and led me to a Chevy Beretta with an automatic transmission and no air.

Another time I told the salesman what I wanted to pay for the car, what interest rate I wanted, and how much I could put down. He wrote it all down then went to “discuss it with his manager.”

When he came back he said that he had good news, they could give me the car for a higher price, at a higher interest rate, and all I’d have to do was make a larger initial down payment.  I told him that this was not good news, and that he’d failed to deliver any of the things I’d wanted. He told me, “Sir, you have to be flexible.” I told him exactly what I say in the third panel of this comic, and to this day the memory of it makes me proud.

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How to Eliminate Clutter

Behold, Missy 2.0! This is the second iteration of Missy, and looking back, I think these are some of my best drawings of her.

The item next to Missy in panel 1 is a Christmas Fez she made for me many years ago. It’s red with white fur trim and a white tassel. It’s just the thing to wear to Christmas parties. Of course, I don’t get invited to many Christmas parties, possibly because people know I’ll wear the fez.

Note from Missy: I’m wondering if it’s me 2.0 or me 3.0 that has the blob of hair that looks like a rooster. I’m thinking it’s actually 3.0.

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How to Eliminate Clutter

Behold, Missy 2.0! This is the second iteration of Missy, and looking back, I think these are some of my best drawings of her.

The item next to Missy in panel 1 is a Christmas Fez she made for me many years ago. It’s red with white fur trim and a white tassel. It’s just the thing to wear to Christmas parties. Of course, I don’t get invited to many Christmas parties, possibly because people know I’ll wear the fez.

Note from Missy: I’m wondering if it’s me 2.0 or me 3.0 that has the blob of hair that looks like a rooster. I’m thinking it’s actually 3.0.

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How to Calm a Frightened Child

This is another comic I really like, and I always regretted that I didn’t find other excuses to use the drawing in panel three.

Looking at the drawing now, I probably could have freaked the kid out by just showing him my jacked up right pinky. You may laugh, but I know a guy with a jacked-up pinky, and he does use it to freak people out, so there is precedent.

Note from Missy: the guy with the jacked-up pinky? Plays the role of the Emperor of the Moon’s number-one moon minion. And yeah, his pinky is totes freaky.

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As always, thanks for using my Amazon Affiliate links (US, UK, Canada).

How to Calm a Frightened Child

This is another comic I really like, and I always regretted that I didn’t find other excuses to use the drawing in panel three.

Looking at the drawing now, I probably could have freaked the kid out by just showing him my jacked up right pinky. You may laugh, but I know a guy with a jacked-up pinky, and he does use it to freak people out, so there is precedent.

Note from Missy: the guy with the jacked-up pinky? Plays the role of the Emperor of the Moon’s number-one moon minion. And yeah, his pinky is totes freaky.

You can comment on this comic on Facebook.

As always, thanks for using my Amazon Affiliate links (US, UK, Canada).